Love notes from Freya, 6/29/14

I checked in with my Lady today, and got a long, loving lecture about how I am beautiful–each and every curve, stretch mark, and bump–and was told in no uncertain terms that I am a Queen. (This a common lecture from Her. Many of us get it on a daily basis.) So, then what should I tell others? I asked. This is what She said:

Tell them that they are all Queens as well. If they don’t believe me, or have forgotten, tell them to come and ask me. I will make them feel this truth. Anyone can come to me–anyone at all. I will gladly help them see that they are Loved. Tell them they are welcome to come.

Yes, Momma. Thank you, Momma.

And yes, Freya is one of the most approachable of the Gods in the Nordic pantheon. She and Odin are the ones that newcomers often interact with first. You can see why 🙂

Radiomancy (When in doubt, ask the radio)

I’ve heard for years from fellow pagans who swear that the radio offers them up very specific and often snarky answers to whatever problem they are currently struggling with. Back when I used to listen to the radio, I found this to be true as well. However, I *hate* listening to the radio; announcers and commercials and endlessly repeated songs and none of my favorite music being played turned me off of it years ago. I love music, though–I sing constantly, quote lyrics, and usually have a random song going through my head at any given moment of the day. The Radio in my Head is the closest I’ve had to radiomancy up until recently, and really, despite the amount of music in my iTunes, it’s really pretty limited material to draw from.

But now that I’ve Come Back Online, as my fellow (highly relieved) priestesses keep telling me, I’m trying to open myself back up to things like Meaningful Dreams and Radiomancy, the kind of stuff that I had kind of fallen out of practice with.

And, as with everything involving the Hellenic or Nordic Gods, the response is immediate and snarky.

Case in point:

I was bemoaning (in my head) how I was supposed to go about managing working with both Freya and Zeus. They are very different deities coming from very different pantheons, and are both extremely powerful and dominant personalities. Personally, I’ve always felt more comfortable with women in power (yay Freya!) and Zeus is, well, patriarchy personified (though I’ve since come to find that he’s not nearly as much of a boor as I head feared). As this was going through my head while driving on the highway, I suddenly decided that I was sick of all of the CDs in my car and the playlists on my phone. Looking for something new and different (while driving, mind you; so it had to be quick and easy to find), I thought I’d give iTunes Radio one last try. It’s never worked out for me in the past, but I was desperate. Hmm, what channel? Well, I’m sick of the 80s, not in the mood for 70s, 60s, or 50s; might as well trying the 90s station. I clicked through the first song (a rap song) and landed on a Counting Crows song that I vaguely remembered.

The song? Goes like this:

“I belong in the service of the Queen

I belong anywhere but in between

She’s been crying and I’ve been thinking

And I am the Rain King.”

Service of the Queen? I am, in fact, in service of The Queen.

I don’t belong in-between? Yes! Someone who understands.

“I am the Rain King”? Throw any lightning bolts recently, Zeus? 🙂 I appreciate you paying attention to my troubles and acknowledging that my Lady is my primary. (Though, apparently, you guys might have a deeper and more complex relationship than I had originally assumed.) Really, he’s turned out to be a lot more of the involved fatherly type than I had ever expected. I guess he has the potential to balance out Freya’s immense influence in my life pretty well.

I shouldn’t complain, I guess. Lots of pagans don’t get that kind of direct and immediate response from their Goddess or deities or whatever. But me, this is why I chose Paganism–direct interaction with deity! Woot! (And since I was otherwise considering being a monk, and I’m not of the right gender nor actually interested in being celibate, that wouldn’t have worked out.)

It’s just so weird hearing the words of Zeus set to a Counting Crows song. But it was while I was on the highway, which, for whatever reason, is his favorite time to contact me.

Love notes from Freya, 6/26/14

Cats. Take care of your cats. (gestures to the horde of felines circling about her feet) Love, Freya

Yes, ma’am. Duly noted. (Maybe I should ask for some help in finding catsitters for next week.)

This “cats” order reminds me of my first time I consciously reached out to Freya. I had just found out about Asatru and starting hanging out with my first kindred. At the time, I was also in grad school and feeling lonely. (One of the many reasons I had gone to grad school was to find a guy, and I was sorely disappointed that my chosen field was filled with women, gay men, and taken hetero guys.) When I asked the gothi about it, he suggested this spell: take a piece of paper and write down exactly what I am looking for. Put it into a small container with a cat on it; ask Freya to bless it and bring me the love that I need; and put it in the window to send it out. So I did. I asked Freya for someone who liked to snuggle, was laid back, and was independent and didn’t require a lot of my attention (in grad school, who has the time?)

Two hours later, I was surprised to hear my gray tabby, Harbarth (“Greybeard”) start up a conversation with someone through my window. I looked out, and the sweetest brown tabby cat with a white belly was sitting outside, mrowing at my gray cat. I went out on the porch and looked around to see if someone had dropped him off, or at least knew where he came from. The street was deserted. He had no tag, so I brought him in, and almost immediately he sat down next to me and started purring. It was love at first sight.

It wasn’t until a few months had passed that I realized he did, in fact, meet the standards I had asked for. I had said nothing about which species I wanted. And as I watched several of my peers struggle with ever-increasing boyfriend drama throughout grad school, I was secretly grateful I had been given a cat instead.

From this experience, I learned several things:

  1. Magic works. (Or perhaps the Gods are just a lot more helpful than I had thought.)
  2. This Freya deity seems pretty responsive and powerful. Maybe I should be serious about starting build a relationship with her
  3. The Gods are going to send you what you need rather than what you think you want. So, to a certain extent, it doesn’t matter how specific you are. Being specific only sets up expectations and you can miss the gift when the Gods decide to send it to you.
  4. However, if you’re determined to do a spell, rather than ask the Gods for help, you need to know exactly what you want, and be specific when asking for it.
  5. I will always need to have a lovebug cat in my life. And to this day, I always have.

My current catnips: Ra and Anubis. (You can guess which is which.) Ra is my adventurous wanderer, and Anubis is my snuggle/purr cat.

Nubie on Draim                cats snuggling on chair

Ra and Cernunos

A love song for Odr, “A Hero Comes Home”

Odr is Freya’s long-lost husband. We know they were married (probably before the Aesir/Vanir war). He may have left her to go off to war, protecting Vanaheim or raiding like the rest of the Vikings. He may have left because he just didn’t want to be with Freya anymore. We don’t know. We know next to nothing about him. The only thing we really know is that Freya loved this being so much–above all of her other amours, apparently–that She has been searching for him ever since, longing, crying tears of gold. (It’s possible that he may have become Odin, or is a hypostase of Odin, and that she partnered up with him again after the War– we just don’t know.)

A Hero Comes Home (from Beowulf, 2007; sung by Idina Metzel)

Out of the mist of history

He’ll come again

Sailing on ships across the sea

To a wounded nation

Signs of a savior, like fire on the water

It’s what we prayed for, one of our own

Just wait–though wide he may roam

Always a hero comes home

He goes where no one has gone

But always, a hero comes home

Deep in the heart of darkness sparks

A dream of light

Surrounded by hopelessness

He finds the will to fight

There’s no surrender, always remember

It doesn’t end here, we’re not alone

 Just wait–though wide he may roam

Always a hero comes home

He goes where no one has gone

But always, a hero comes home

And he will come back on the crimson tide

Dead or alive

And even though we know the bridge has burned

He will return

He will return!

Just wait–though wide he may roam

Always, a hero comes home

He knows of places unknown

But always, a hero comes home

Someday they’ll carve in stone

“The hero comes home”

He goes, and comes back alone

But always, a hero comes home

Just wait–though wide he may roam

Always, a hero comes home…

(Not my own creation, unfortunately, but dead on, in my opinion.)