Deep thoughts: Gifting and golddigging

I had two deep thoughts today.

First, Freya gives to herself (and we do, too)

Odin sacrifices “himself to himself” for knowledge of the runes and whatnot; but Freya — Freya is a giver. Working on the Facets of Freya ritual today, I kept getting the message “I am a gift”. (Me, attempting to clarify: “Who is a gift? Me?” Freya: “YES.”  “To who?” YES.” “To you?” “YOU ARE THE GIFT.”)  sigh. So I thought, well, if Odin can sacrifice himself to himself, than I can give myself to myself. I give myself to myself; I am both the giver and the gift. Which fits in perfectly with the facet of Freya that I will be portraying–the Freya of Self-Love. (If you could only see the way She loves us…)

Second, Freya as a golddigger. Literally.

Today’s work also brought up this quote: “I am the daughter of a master navigator. There is no gold I cannot find or treasure I cannot uncover and make shine.” And I thought, Well, of course. She loves gold and beauty in all of its forms. She found the best gold/treasure the dwarves had to offer, and went after it, breaking all kinds of Asgardian rules and thoroughly pissing Odin off (depending on your pov). And She loves and is doted on by Her father, Njord, the god of Fishing,Trade, and Commerce. (Vanic gods, the both of them, so modify anything They do with the adjective “abundantly”.) Who’s to say that Her guidance won’t always bring us to richer and better things? Maybe She is a golddigger, but in a good way. I mean, She is a giver.

Dwarves!

Cinderella’s (soon to be Sleeping Beauty’s) Prince: Yes, but even one prick–it’s my thing about blood–

Rapunzel’s (soon to be Snow White’s) Prince : Well, it’s sick!

CP: It’s no sicker than your thing with dwarfs!

RP: Dwarves!

CP: Dwarfs.

RP: Dwarves are very upsetting….

Actually, they’re not that upsetting at all, just kind of surprising. And happy folk for Freyaspeople to come visit. So, let’s talk dwarves, shall we?

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Scythian “Golden Woman” burial

“Reconstruction shows how ancient Scythian ‘Princess’ discovered in Kazakhstan looked like”

This has nothing to do with Freya or Heathenry and everything to do with GOLD. I couldn’t stop looking. It’s mind boggling. Gods, I love archaeology.

Scythian princess Scythian headdress ram-griffin plaques combgolden wolf fang

A Scythian “Golden princess”, circa 400-500-BCE. That last photo says this: “The sleeves of the garment were adorned with wolf fangs in gold trim.” Yes, you read that right. Wolf fangs–wrapped in gold. You’re welcome.

Love notes from Freya, 8/12/14

“Wealth. Richness. Get it. Feel the power of the gold!” (Or something along those lines.) Love, Freya

*shrug* Sometimes I just get concepts from Her–she imbues them with urgent emotion, somehow, but they are still just concepts. Apparently She is thinking a lot about money and wealth and wishes to bless us all with such abundance. Sometimes I get the feeling that She is trying to give us All The Money, but is blocked by something; I wish I knew what. Pagans as a group are not the most financially successful crowd; which, given that we have no vow of poverty to uphold, is pretty unnecessary.

(Her “Gold/Wealth/Things that you Value and are Valuable/The Good Life” side is one that I pick up on pretty regularly. I call this side of Her the “Smaug” side, especially when She’s focused on material things.)

Anyway. You, too, deserve to live in the lap of luxury! Here’s some inspiration:

gold bars

Why Freya Makes Me Cry

I started out writing a post explaining the love notes, but ended up writing the “why she makes me cry” post. It is what it is….

I “check in” with Freya every day–kind of like I check my email–to see if She has any words of inspiration to pass on. I do it because it’s part of my commitment to Her, to write these love notes and post them for people. It’s not because I’m particularly holy or special; I just do it because I promised that I would.

It’s not that simple, though. I’m very sensitive–physically, emotionally, pretty much in every way–and I can get overwhelmed quickly, so normally I keep my emotions and ability to sense things tightly locked down. In order to hear Her, however, I need to open these senses back up. What I usually get when I open up my shields is a feeling; an image; and anywhere between one word/or concept and a full sentence or two. Sometimes it’s easy–I just think of Her, look at Her statue, and Bam! message received. Sometimes I get just the barest thread of a message and have to go digging for it, which ends up being a big drain on my time and energy. Sometimes I get nothing–nada–no matter what I do; and I’m not always sure if it’s because I’m too emotionally or spiritually exhausted that day, or if She just doesn’t have anything to say. Regardless of what I need to do to get the message from Her, more often than not I get punched in the gut with some kind overwhelming emotion, either good or bad. I really can’t prepare for this because I never know what I’m going to get.

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Devotional Polytheist Meme, 1: Wealth

The first question from Galina Krasskova’s Devotional Polytheist meme:

1. What wealth have the divinities brought into your life?

Hmm, “wealth”. Well, that gets to the heart of anything Freya-related right away; no warm-up here! What an apt place to begin analyzing my life with my goddess, seeing how She is a goddess of material (and emotional) wealth, and Her tribe is the tribe of abundance of all kinds.

I pondered this one for a while before I decided what I was going to say. I knew what I thought I “should” say, what people would want to hear or expect to hear from “a Freyaswoman”, but I decided to go the real, gritty route instead. So, let me give some context about my experience, and what it has meant to me to be the daughter of a Goddess of Wealth and Abundance. (I try not to write mega-posts, but this is going to be a long one, so bear with me.)

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Pablo Neruda, and a gold ship

Just got back from a lovely event for Aphrodite that involved painting things gold and reading love poetry. (I couldn’t have planned a better event for Freya, actually; I think I may just co-opt this event whole hog and use it in my Vanic group. We’ll see how it goes.) It was a great evening event, with the gilding and chatting happening first and their usual ritual format, with the love poetry added, taking place afterwards.

I brought along a small viking ship to be gilded. I had previously owned a Swarofski gold ship of similar dimensions, but that was lost in the divorce. This one looks even cooler and is quite a bit cheaper. It’s amazing what a coat of gold paint will do (the original looks like this, minus the rigging). The ship is for my Freyr altar, which admittedly does not get nearly enough love. It’s my version of  Skíðblaðnir. It doesn’t need to be gold, true, but as with any of the Vanir–gold is the way to go.

 gold ship 2    gold ship 1

The poem I contributed was one of my favorites, by Pablo Neruda. Not only does he invent the term sleeping amber, which won my heart instantly, but his poems also have that element of magical realism that I love so much.

Sonnet LXXXI

Already, you are mine. Rest with your dream inside my dream.

Love, grief, labour, all must sleep now.

Night revolves on invisible wheels

and joined to me you are pure as sleeping amber.

No one else will sleep with my dream, love.

You will go, we will go joined by the waters of time.

No other one will travel the shadows with me,

only you, eternal nature, eternal sun, eternal moon.

Already your hands have opened their delicate fists

and let fall, without direction, their gentle signs,

your eyes enclosing themselves like two grey wings,

while I follow the waters you bring that take me onwards:

night, Earth, winds weave their fate, and already,

not only am I not without you, I alone am your dream.